


perfection

by leleluv



Category: nctzens - Fandom
Genre: Angst, Bulimia, Eating Disorders, Gen, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-28
Updated: 2019-06-28
Packaged: 2020-05-28 05:25:36
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 801
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19387402
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/leleluv/pseuds/leleluv
Summary: hyuck just wants to be good enough





	perfection

**Author's Note:**

> vent fic beware 030

"FUCK" hyuck yelled looking down at his phone. He knew itd probably freak the managers and members around him but thats not what mattered to him right now. All that mattered was how much he fucked up. Hyuck had recently installed yet another random dieting app and hed gone 100 cals over budget. hyuck tapped the drivers shoulder and said "drive faster please" The other member had a look of confusion and concern on their faces but it didnt matter to hyuck. he had his eyes on his "prize".

After what seemed like ages (basically 15 minutes) to hyuck they finally arrived at the dorm. Contradictary to what he did earlier he wanted to seem as normal as possible. He joked with his members as they walked to the door. After the door was opened hyuck did semi-sped to the bathroom not making much of a scene. 

At last hyuck finally got where he wanted. he was in the bathroom,,hyuck knew what he was about to do wasnt healthy but if it helped him reach his goal anything was worth it. Hyuck stepped on the scale and his face drooped. He was upset he didnt like the number. Hyuck got on his knees head hovering over the toilet ready to do what hed planned.

He stuck his fingers down his throat gagging just a little but nothing came up, so he shoved them down further and further repeatedly until he was satisfied ignoring the tears rolling down his face and toilet water splashing up af him. admist all of this he didnt realise the presence behind him. 

As hyuck stood up to clean himself up and step on the scale yet again, he saw Mark as he turned around. Mark just looked at him confused and worried and said "Donghyuck, what are you doing? What did you just do?" Donghyuck knew Mark knew what he'd just done and he KNEW it had ruined the "cute sweet perfect boy" image hed been going for.

Nevertheless Donghyuck tried to play it off. He said the first excuse that popped into his head "Its nothing really I just tried to get something out of my throat!!" _dumb that was dumb_ hyuck thought to himself, he couldnt change the excuse now though mark would believe him even less if he did.

Mark replied "Donghyuck, dont lie. I know what you just did." His voice was stern, he was concerned but hyuck took it as anger.

Donghyuck looked Mark in the eyes and said "This is what I have to do to fit in here. Mark you wouldnt understand, you're talented , you're funny, and your body its perfect, but IM not. I dont just LOOK like the other members any other fucking kpop idol im HUGE. My body doesnt look like theirs naturally the only way they'll like me is if it does, so i do what I must to make it at least okay," 

Mark looked at Donghyuck there was obvious concern and worry in his eyes Mark began to say "Hyuck you're perfect-"

"Shut up Mark. No more lying stop saying things you know arent true. The next time I have to hear the 'you're perfect' speech ESPECIALLY from someone like,you the most perfect person I know, I'm gonna fucking lose it." Donghyuck pushed pass Mark not even bothering to flush his vomit leaving it for Mark to flush, and laid down in his bed.

Donghyuck laid there letting himself fall asleep. Hyuck ended up waking up to Mark shaking him. Donghyuck was annoyed to say the least. "What do you want minhyung?" Mark let out a shaky breath and said "Donghyuck can we please talk about what happened?" Mark did seem really worried and donghyuck wasnt in the mood to be sarcastic, donghyck sighed and nodded. "Can I ask you a question?"Mark was prepared to recieve a harsh no but was glad he recieved a soft nod. "Why didn't you tell me from the start? I thought you trusted me."

Donghyuck took in a breath and said "I didnt tell you for alot of reasons Mark.Mostly cause its not about you and i dont want anyone to blame themselves for my shit."

Mark looked at Donghyuck so confused as to how donghyuck didnt see how pretty he was. "Donghyuck, I didnt go through that and I dont know how to comfort you but Im here to listen always"

Donghyuck smiled at him _better than i expected_ he thought to himself. "Okay Mark thank you, now go to bed its late"

Mark knew he wouldn't and couldnt "fix" Hyuck, Donghyuck would have to learn to love himself before he fully recovered, and Mark knew that. Both parties did what they could for now and thats all that mattered to them.

**Author's Note:**

> based off my friend catching me in the mall and tryna talk ab it at her sleepover thing


End file.
